All of this technology is great. So great, that I have no need for people in my life anymore. Apparently.
This isn't a pro/con list (although you know how I love lists!) of how technology affects our lives. There are plenty of those out there, and enough super-smart bloggers with more time and putting in more effort than I to do that here. Instead, A rant.
I've found over the last few months that it bothers me more and more when people tell me they read my blog. Not that I don't want them to, because in fact I have invited several people to read it, given them the address and so on. But the part about it that bothers me is the appearance of intimacy by simply READING about me. Few have offered to go out to coffee, have dinner, a ball game. And the ones that do, I anxiously await comments from, because I know that the conversation will be continued in person. This is another issue: commenting on a blog, or anywhere else on the internet, is not a valid form of friendship. Just as texting is not a conversation, a comment is usually finite. A conversation is fluid, and gives way to more than just words, but to meaning.
I'm struggling with this issue right now in particular because it seems that some of those who I thought were closest to me, have settled into a comfortable and convenient routine. Rather than spend time with me (regularly scheduled, weekly time that has been in place far longer than either of us) they think a text saying something entirely superficial will suffice. As if there is a communication quota, and the more innane words sent via cellular waves, the closer they are to meeting the quota.
I will not settle for meaninglessness. And if that is what my relationships have turned into, whether because of technology or by way of technology, something has to change. I don't know if that's leaving the technology behind, which at this point in our society would be pretty radical. Disconnecting entirely could have the opposite effect I'm longing for, and leave me even more disconnected than I am now. However, a weekly text of comment left on my blog will not suffice.
All of this to say that I want genuine connection. No cheap, digital, replacement.