Saturday, April 19

Can you even call it a yo-yo if there's no connectedness?

I went out on a date, what seemed and felt and for all intents and purposes was a date, last night. Another one of those EH prospectives. I don't know if everyone else that uses the site is like me, but I feel like, if the purpose is to meet people, then I sure am meeting my fair share.
We went out to dinner, had some awkward conversation punctuated by a waiter that was obviously trying to flirt with me, and my date noticed too. Thankfully he seemed to have a sense of humor about it. But how weird is that? Twenty three years of nothing, and then two in one night? Dinner was kind of fun, actually. The guy, since this was our first official meeting, was SO much cuter than his personality allowed, and his mannerisms/persoanlity melted me. To the point where I was kind of like..."why are you even here with me? You could do so much better." He was just flat out adorable. We went to an arcade after that, and I spent a little on air hockey and skee ball. The night ended early, and I left feeling so unsure about what had even happened, where we were going. Basically I was being an insecure girl about it all.
We talked today, and I feel a little better. He's still interested, even after meeting me and seeing all the weirdness that is ME. So we'll take it one step at a time I suppose.

I guess this brings me to my point: I don't like this dating thing. It's really uncomfortable, and really sucky. I have to kind of wait around for some guy to call me up and say he likes me, and try not to scare him off with some facet of my personality that will inevitably come out AFTER we hopefully-if-we-get-that-far dating. I'm beginning to think there may have been something to the arranged marriages of the past...?

I'm exhausted after all the up and down emotions of the last 48 hours. I would much appreciate a little R&R. I did however, read a fabulous book this afternoon. Written in lyrical prose that is more like poetry, Crank by Ellen Hopkins is a story of meth through the eyes of a teenage girl. SO GOOD!

1 comment:

Anna said...

sorry for all the upleasant up and down ness! i'm glad it went well though!! i can't wait to hear all about it! you're making me reconsider the whole online thing.