Wednesday, March 19

12 steps

I think I found an answer to my nagging dissatisfaction.

The last few months have I've spent in purgatory: a state of some distraction, with no real direction, no real landing space and no real calm. I realize I'm living in reality, but it feels cast off, like someone else's leftover life, and not really mine. Not really one that I'm actively living, actively engaging in.

Step one: Move. I realize that to some of you, even some that know me, this might looklike running away from something. But I want to feel settled. Something that I don't and haven't since I moved to Idaho. I've been in constant transition. From one house to another, from one group of friends to another, one job to the next. I want some stability. Some piece of something that is my own for a preconceived amount of time. Even if it's rented, even if it's trashy. It's mine for a while.

Step two: Yoga. I started sometime in February as part of a wellness program with work. I pretty much love it. Right now I yoga (is there a verb for what you do when you do yoga?) once a week, and any spare time I have to practice at home. Which is not much. Spare time that is. I would love to find a more structured and affordable way to practice more often. A class, a group of friends to learn with etc.

Step three: The Artists Way
I know I need to write more, and I would love to go through this book as a way to inspire creativity and passion for my writing. I subscribe to the MSA Seed Sampler, and this month's sample had a call for letters. It made me rethink the things I spend my time on. In the call, it gave examples of things to write about. All of which I want to do, have started to do, but have failed for some reason or another. I know part of it has to do with time: how I spend it and how I value it. Or don't. I would love to plant a garden, throw a party to celebrate life, or volunteer

Step four: Blog. So you and I can keep track of how I'm doing with it all.

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