Wednesday, January 30

Moving {on}

Is it bad that I find my much older maintenance man attractive? In this slightly awkward, soft-spoken, I won't tell if you don't, man of the back roads and all the ones in between kind of way.

On another note, I'm trying very hard to remain positive about the prospects of my computer working. Ever. Again and sometime in the near future. I have an online class that start February 7th, so it would be awesome read: necessary for it to be working by then. And the handsome friend that doesn't want me to be attracted to him seems only slightly TOO interested in helping. If you don't want to come across as interested yourself, steer clear. I read into everything. Third time's a charm with me, and he's working on numero trace, or however you spell it.

And on the homefront: I am so moving out. I am realizing that it has less to do with me wanting my own space, or needing to be free from my parent's oh-so-loving gaze. And more with needing to be on my own, make my own mistakes, pay for my own shit. For goodness sakes, my mother monitors my bank account and if I have less than twenty dollars transfers money in there so I can avoid overdraft fees. Did I just feel my butt getting wiped? While I appreciate that they want me to do well, THEY can't cut the cord, and it stifles me, makes me feel inadequate in a lot of ways, and prevents me from growing up all the way. Nobody wants a girl that is, for all intents and purposes, still a GIRL.

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