Monday, November 15

Lone Wolf

I wish there was some way to make things make sense. If there was, people wouldn't get mixed up, have to ask for advice from other people just as confused, and return to where they came from with no more clarity than when they beagn the quest for knowledge. If you can even call it that. I simply long for simplicity. A yes to mean yes and a no to mean no. A friend to be a friend wherever you go. But that seems impossible. Recently, I poured my heart out to a friend. I trusted her with hurt that I had never trusted anyone with before, and felt validated when she understood where I was coming from. But when she made a biting remark that cut to the core of me, knowing it would, I felt betrayed. This doesn't make sense to me. Why do people do these things? Is it like the pack of wolves who hunt together, need each other to bring down their intended victim, and then when they kill their prey turn on each other in order to gain the most for themselves? I hope not. I thought that once together, you were there. I know that when I invest in someone, I invest wholeheartedly. Giving my all and leaving things that can be important to me behind to ensure that my friends or the people in my life get whatever it is that they need. Doesn't everyone? If not, why does it seem like I'm the lone wolf who gets shooed away every time?

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